One
by Garrett
Summary: Oz reacts to the death of Tara in his own way, and returns to Sunnydale. This is a songfic, with each part corresponding to a song from the Beatles' greatest hits album, One. Concept inspired by Jason Thompson's "Working Class Hero" fics (which used the w
1. Track 1: Love Me Do

"Love, love me do  
You know I love you  
I'll always be true  
So please love me do  
Whoa love me do...."

I listen to the Beatles like I have, it seems, just about every day since I left Sunnydale for the last time, and I remember how I used to love their early songs. Of course, I remind myself, that's because those songs remind me of Willow.

If there's anything that can cause me to show emotion, it's Willow. All of the pendants and talismans I wear in order to keep my wolf side from emerging mean nothing when I'm around her. The last few months have been especially difficult, as something inside me keeps telling me that something's wrong with Willow. During a set in Cincinnati, I began sobbing for no reason other than a wave of grief hitting me like a gust of hot air. The guys were as shocked as I, but they knew just as well as I what it meant: Willow.

We're ten minutes outside of LA. When I say "we", I mean the group. About 10 months ago, I had run into the other Dingoes in Cleveland, and it was just like old times. Within a month, I was back at lead guitar, and we were touring the country, trying very much to get noticed, and trying even harder not to suck.

The group has this bus that we use to get around in. A tour bus. We've got a tour bus. Devon loves it, especially since he gets an insane amount of women just by showing them our messy tour bus. Naturally, he spends the most time driving it.

My "space" is about 7 rows of seats back. Since I sold my van as soon as I re-joined the Dingoes, my part of the bus has everything that used to be in it. I rarely notice much of it, except a picture of Willow from my last summer with her. I can't let go of her, even after two years. I lost her when I slept with Veruca, and now she belongs to Tara. I tell myself that constantly, but yet.....

I get another feeling, and I know I'm going to lose control. "Stop the bus!" I growl to Devon, and when he looks at me, his face quickly shifts from a look of puzzlement to one of fear as he sees the wolf begin to take over.

The bus pulls over quickly as I stumble out, fighting for the control that I've already lost. The reason for the change hits me like some sort of vision as the change completes itself and I lose awareness: Tara has just died.


	2. Track 2: From Me to You

"Oz?"

I hear a woman's voice calling my name, and I'm almost certain that it's Willow. However, instead of opening my eyes, I lie back and imagine what I should tell her, what I *will* tell her, when I awake.

If there's anything that you want  
If there's anything that I can do  
Just call on me and I send it along  
With love from me to you  
I got everything that you want  
Like a heart that's oh, so true  
Just call on me and I send it along  
With love from me to you  
I got arms that long to hold  
you and keep you by my side  
I got lips that long to kiss  
you and keep you satisfied  
If there's anything that you want  
If there's anything that I can do  
Just call on me and I send it along  
With love from me to you  
Just call on me and I send it along  
With love from me to you  
I got arms that long to hold  
you and keep you by my side  
I got lips that long to kiss  
you and keep you satisfied  
If there's anything that you want  
If there's anything that I can do  
Just call on me and I send it along  
With love from me to you

***********************************************************************

"Hey, Cordy, what's your friend mumbling about?" asked Gunn.

"Willow," answered Angel knowingly.

"You mean that redheaded chick that's friends with your ex?"

"Yeah," answered the vampire with a slight bitterness in his voice.

"Why'd he, you know, wolf out?" asked Fred, who was now hovering over Oz's prone form. "The full moon isn't even for another two weeks."

"Willow told me that he'd been trying to control the changes," replied Cordelia. "He left the second time because he lost control...."

"Around red?"

"Worse, Gunn," came Cordelia's pained reply. "He lost it around Tara because he smelled Willow's scent on her."

"Wow," murmured Gunn as he tightened his grip on Fred's hand. "He must really love her."

"Kinda explains why he's been a wolf for the past three weeks," remarked Fred. "Should we wake him up and tell him what happened?"

"No," declared Angel flatly. "He's going to have to deal with it anyways, but he deserves to get some rest first."

Cordelia began to protest, but Angel glared at her, motioning towards his office. The two started in that direction, but were stopped by Fred. "Wait," she replied timidly. "I think he's waking up."

***********************************************************************

No longer able to keep my eyes closed, I open them and immediately my eyes sear from the fluorescent light. I'm also ambushed by feelings of sadness, remorse, and fear.

Then I remember. I lost control. My eyes finally come into focus, and I see a woman with long brown hair. She's a very thin woman, and looks extremely worried. She reminds me of Willow.

I sit up and try to ask about Willow, but all that comes out of my mouth is a weak-sounding, "Willow...."

"Shh," she soothes. "Lie down; everything's alright. You're with friends, Oz."

I look at her with a questioning glare, and she backs off fearfully into the the arms of a really big and tough looking guy that I presume is her boyfriend or something. A familiar scent catches my attention and I turn around, seeing Angel and Cordelia for the first time. "Hey," I reply, giving them what for me is a huge smile. "Why am I here?" Looking at myself, I realize that I'm also quite naked under my covers. "And where are my clothes?"

"You wolfed out," announces Cordy.

"Yeah, I remember that," I respond. "How long did it last?"

"Three weeks."

Three weeks. The wolf was in control for almost a month. I look at myself, unsure of what to say. "Did I hurt anyone?"

"Four dead, 27 injured," answers Cordelia gravely.

I can't believe it. I've killed again. "Why.....?"

"Giles thinks that it's because you sensed what was going on with Willow," she replies, hating every moment of this, much as I am.

"Why, what happened?" I'm almost certain that it has to do with my premonition about Tara, but nothing seems to make sense enough right now for me to tell anyone that.

"Her girlfriend, Tara," answers Cordy as my face grows cold with remorse, "she was killed. Willow totally lost it; she killed the person who shot Tara, and tried to call yet another one of the world-destroying demons we all know and love so much." Cordy's sarcasm held a bitter edge to it, as always, but this time it sounded like she actually sympathized with Willow.

"Is she....?"

"She's alright," answers the ex-cheerleader, speaking with relief in her voice that she wouldn't have had when I first met her. "I don't know how he did it, but Xander talked her down. Buffy says that he's been helping her with pretty much everything except bathing and eating."

I can't help but smirk as she tells me this. They're still joined at the hip, figuratively speaking, of course. As much as I like Xander, I can't help but hate him. The love he shares with Willow is simply amazing, and I hate Xander for it, because I'll never have that bond with her.

I'm completely lost in thought until Cordelia asks, "Oz? Are you OK?"

"Yeah," I answer, burying the turmoil in my heart and my soul. "I think I just need something to eat, is all."

Cordelia looked around, obviously looking to get someone else to make me something. I have to say that I was a bit relieved when the girl left first. Cordy is many things, but a good cook is certainly not one of them.

My makeshift breakfast of toast, milk, and Corn Flakes was joined by formal introductions to Fred (the girl who reminded me of Willow), Gunn (the big guy who was indeed Fred's boyfriend), Lorne (a demon from another world who was very....interesting, to say the least), and Connor (Angel's son, which was a bit of a concept to handle, particularly since Connor is a teenager).

I don't talk much while I eat, but it's a bit hard to talk when you've found out that you went on a deadly werewolf rampage for three weeks because you got some funny feeling that the love of your life had just lost her girlfriend. But for me, it's just another turn of events.

Then it hits me. Like always, the source of my turmoil has been Willow. Even though we finally broke it off that night two years ago, I'm still in love with her. I need to see her again, and I need to either get her back, or get over her. I only wish I knew which one was going to hurt me, and her, less.


	3. Track 3: She Loves You

"Hey Buffy," replied Xander with a troubled smile as the Slayer let him into her house. "Is Willow here?"

"No," she answered, showing a touch of nervousness as she spoke, much to Xander's puzzlement. "She went out. Shopping. Out shopping. Out shopping for things. By herself, even."

"OK," declared the "normal" Slayerette, certain that something was going on. Shaking aside those concerns, he asked his friend earnestly, "Can we talk?"

"Sure," responded Buffy warmly as she motioned towards the dining room table. Once they were seated, she asked, "So, what's up?" with a wide smile.

"It's about....well, it's Willow."

Buffy's smile quickly faded. "What's happened? Has she...?"

Xander vigorously shook his head no, reassuring her briefly. "No, it's nothing like that. She's doing great. All things considered, of course." Buffy nodded, knowing full well how Willow's grief had been compounded by the intense guilt of attacking both Giles and Anya, to say nothing of the other damage she had done in her mad rage. "It's more of a 'me' thing, really."

"You're scaring me, Xand," she said worriedly. "What is it? What's with 'you'?"

"I'm falling in love with Willow, again," he replied guiltily.

"But you already love her," answered Buffy, not yet catching on. After a moment, it hit her, and the surprise was great indeed. "Oh. Oh, Xander. I....I don't know what....You realize that she's kinda...*gay* now.....don't you?"

"Yes," he said flatly. "Hence the pain and suffering. Why couldn't I have realized this like, oh, five years ago?"

"It's not your fault, Xander," soothed the Slayer. "You took Will for granted; we've all done it at least once."

"But she doesn't love me," he pleaded. "Not like she used to, anyways."

"But she loves you," she reminded him. Attacking the problem from another angle, Buffy said, "You think you've lost your love, Xander. Well, I saw her yesterday, and...." Realizing the silliness of her last comment, she added, "Of course, I see her every day, but that's beside the point. The point is, it's you she's thinking of."

"Buffy," interrupted Xander, "you're almost singing right now, you know that, don't you."

Buffy looked at Xander and scowled, not appreciating his attempt at humor. "That's not funny." Getting back to the main conversation, she said, "Look, Xander, she loves you, even after all of the things that have come between the two of you. She loves you, and you know that can't be bad."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," assured the Slayer, "She loves you, and you know, deep down, you should be glad."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," dismissed Xander, his poor spirits still unshaken.

"You hurt her, Xander," said Buffy. "She almost lost her mind when she found out about you and Cordelia. But she never stopped loving you. She told me that you're not the hurting kind. A little dense, maybe, but certainly not the hurting kind."

"Yeah, that's me," admitted Xander as he allowed a grin to emerge on his face. "So she says she loves me?"

"Uh huh. I haven't heard from her in a while, but I'm pretty sure the statement still holds." Taking his hands in hers, she added, "And with love like that, you know you should be glad."

A hopeful smile grew on Xander's face, and Buffy gave him some advice. "You know it's up to you, Xander. I think it's only fear, myself. Pride can hurt too. Just apologize to her, apologize because she loves you, and you know that can't be bad." Answering the uncertain look on her friend's face, Buffy replied, "Yes, she loves you, and you should be glad."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," answered Xander with false skepticism as he stood up. The two looked at each other for an awkward moment before Xander hugged her furiously, with all of the love that he had for the Slayer. "Thanks, Buff. You really helped."

"See?" she joked. "Maybe death isn't my only gift." Urging on her now puzzled friend, Buffy said, "Go on. Track Willow down and tell her how you feel."

"Yes sir," mocked the Zeppo as he went into a military salute before opening the front door to leave. The color drained out of his face, though, when he saw who was at the door.

***********************************************************************

The door opened on Willow and I before I could open it for her myself. Willow gasped when she saw Xander, and I wasn't surprised. Once he looked at me, I knew that my being with Willow, here, and now, had just sent a dagger through his heart. "Hey, Xander, what's up?" I ask, hoping to ease the pain of the situation. Suffice to say, it failed miserably.

"Oz," was his blank response, followed by an equally blank "Willow."

Willow was immediately worried, asking, "Xander, is everything alright?"

He brushed her off with his fairly nervous reply, looking at me more than her when he said, "No, nothing at all. I was just talking to Buffy, is all. And now I'm done. So, um, bye." As I watched him walk off, and then saw the dismay on Willow's face (to say nothing of the sympathy on Buffy's), I realized that I may have picked the worst time to come back to Sunnydale.


	4. Track 4: I Want to Hold Your Hand

A few moments after Xander left, Willow made a hasty excuse (something about preparing for summer classes, I think), and ran upstairs to her room. I've seen this confusion and fear in her face before, back when she caught me with Veruca, only this time it hurts even more, in part because I'm coming between her and Xander.

Buffy looks at me, and for a second, I swear that she's disappointed. The moment passes, and she asks me, "Can we talk?" I agree, and we go into the dining room.

"So, how did things go with Willow?" She's being pretty direct, so it's safe to say that Buffy's taking the situation pretty seriously.

"It went well," I answer, using the smug tone of voice that I'm famous for. Of course, it comes off as nothing but arrogance now, which is exactly what I *don't* need at the moment.

"Except the end part," she says, quite matter-of-factly.

"Yeah. Gotta work on those endings."

Buffy smiled momentarily before she spoke. "Look, Oz, I'm going to be honest with you: I don't think you should be here. Willow and Xander need this time together. Their friendship has been messed up for a long time, and they don't need you here, vying for Willow's affections."

"You mean Xander doesn't need it." Yes, I'm lashing out, but I think I've earned it this time.

"Yes," she admitted. "I'd think that you of all people would be able to understand just how much Willow-and me too, for that matter-means to Xander. He'll do anything for her, no matter the cost to himself."

She's right, and I know it. It's why I've stayed away from Sunnydale for so long: I can't bear to hurt Willow any more than I already have. And if I did anything to Xander, she'd hate me forever.

"I know, Buffy," I say before exhaling. "It's just that I need some sort of closure with her. I didn't get that when I was last here, and I want it now, before I hurt anyone else."

She nods, and I know that she understands. "Just don't hurt them, Oz. They're my best friends, and they're all I have, outside of Dawn."

I look at her, and see her, I mean *really* see her, for the first time. And, in a way, we're kindred spirits. "You've got my word, Buffy. I won't do anything to hurt them."

**********************************************************************

The drive home was absolutely intolerable for Xander. The only thing keeping him going was the Music of Pain. And brother, was Xander in a lot of pain right now.

He arrived at his apartment without incident, and entered the messy domicile sullenly, turning on the stereo in hope of drowning his sorrows further in the depressing hole that is country music. Xander turned the dial, passing the gamut of Sunnydale's many stations until he stumbled upon an oldies station. Suddenly inspired, Xander made a quick phone call, then hung up. Immediately, he dialed again, this time calling the Summers residence.

"Hello?"

"Dawn, is Willow there?"

"Um, let me check," responded the teenager on the other end. A second later, Xander heard a distant, "Willow! Phone!" as Dawn checked the easy way.

"I've got it, Dawn," replied a third voice, belonging (of course) to Willow. There was a *click* as Dawn hung up, leaving Xander alone the the telephone with his Willow. "Hello?"

"Willow?"

"Xander!" she stated nervously. "Um. So, what's up?"

"I was just calling to apologize for leaving like I did in front of you an Oz."

"It's O-okay," she lied, the fear and dread in her voice almost emanating through the receiver. "So, what are you doing?"

"Listening to the radio," he replied. "Hey, do you have a radio in your room, or wherever you're at?"

"Yeah," answered Willow with much curiosity. "Why do you want to know?"

"You know that oldies station?" he said nervously. "Well, they just said that they were going to play a really good song, and...."

Willow sighed loudly, knowing full well that Xander was up to something. "OK, I'll turn it on..."

She turned on the radio, and tuned into the station just as Xander asked. "....And this next song comes off our request line, with a special dedication to Willow from Xander."

On the other end, Willow began stammering like crazy as her feelings and thoughts began conflicting wildly. The song began, and it only served to worry her even more.

Oh yeah, I'll tell you something  
I think you'll understand  
Then I'll say that something  
I wanna hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand

Oh, please say to me  
You'll let me be your man  
And please say to me  
You'll let me hold your hand  
Now let me hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand

And when I touch you I feel happy inside  
It's such a feeling  
That my love, I can't hide  
I can't hide, I can't hide

Yeah, you got that something  
I think you'll understand  
When I say that something,  
I wanna hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand  
And when I touch you I feel happy inside  
It's such a feeling  
That my love, I can't hide  
I can't hide, I can't hide

Yeah, you got that something  
I think you'll understand  
When I say that something,  
I wanna hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand

"Xander, I...." Willow tried to speak, but nothing was coming out of her mouth. I love him, but I can't. Not like this. I'm gay! But....I want to. But I'm gay!! I'm not supposed to like guys like that! "I can't, Xander. I'm sorry."

"Willow...."

"No, Xander. I can't. I....need to be alone for a while. Bye."

Xander's heart broke as she hung up on him. "I just want to hold your hand," he whispered, sinking to the ground as he wept.

* * *

At Buffy's house, the scene was much the same as Willow cried. She cried for herself, she cried for Tara, she cried for Oz, and she cried for Xander. And, most of all, she cried for the love that she felt for them, the living and the dead, the men and the woman that were her everything.


	5. Track 5: Can't Buy Me Love

Willow was sitting at the dining room table when Buffy came home, fresh from another exciting day of working at the Doublemeat Palace, home of the Doublemeat Medley, which really didn't have any meat in it at all, a fact that would normally be a much-needed source of humor for the two women, if they weren't in such a depressed mood.

Buffy set aside her troubles when she saw Willow sitting in front of and opened package. "Hey, Will, what's the problem?"

"Men," she answered forlornly.

"I heard that," muttered Buffy to herself, causing Willow to respond with a puzzled look. "Sorry-just thinking out loud. So, what have men done to you? Besides giving you presents, that is."

"That's the problem," said Willow. "Well, half of it."

"OK, spill. What can be so bad about getting unsolicited gifts from guys?"

"Besides the fact that I'm kinda, you know, gay?"

"Oh yeah," sympathized the Slayer. "That."

"And now I have not one, but two-*TWO!*-guys attracted to me." Continuing in a more frustrated tone of voice, Willow asked, "Why couldn't this have happened to me when I wasn't gay?"

"No offense, Will," interjected Buffy, "but you were always 'kinda gay'. Remember Vamp Willow?"

"Yeah," said the ex-witch. "But I wasn't officially gay yet, remember?"

"So? Your vampire self didn't seem to care. She was all over Xander, or so I heard."

"Are you sure?" Willow questioned.

"Yup," she confirmed. "Besides, you wouldn't be all hot and bothered over Xander and Oz if you weren't still attracted to guys, you know."

"Yeah," admitted the hacker. With a sudden burst of eagerness she added, "You know, maybe, hopefully, Xander's as good as Tara and Oz at doing this thing with his tongue-"

"Will, please," blurted out Buffy hastily. "I don't need any mental images of you and Xander having sex."

"Who said that I wanted to have sex with Xander? I didn't. Just because he looks really hot in a speedo, and has the cutest little look on his face when he pouts doesn't mean I want him, because I might want Oz, who's a guitarist with really good hands and fingers...Mmmmm...Where was I? Oh, yeah. I could also want a girl, you know. I mean, there are so many pretty girls out there, with their long, silky hair and their soft hands and their.....well, you know, and I could want both a guy *and* a girl, because guys are so good at the being strong and firm part, and the groping and the thing with their guy part, which looks yucky, but feels so good inside my girl part, and then the girls are so good with the soft and gentle part, and their girl parts are so-"

"Willow!" shouted a now extremely disturbed Buffy. "Too much info."

"Oh, sorry," answered the other girl sheepishly. "But it's just that all these feelings are surging, what with the presents, and the 'bi now', and everything else."

"Will, take a cold shower."

"Cold shower?"

"Yes. Then we can got to the Bronze and have a girls' night out."

"What about Oz and Xander?" asked Willow.

"What about them?" asked Buffy, not following her friend's train of thought.

"You know, the guys with the gifting and the carding?"

"Oh!" declared Buffy, shifting out of her temporary bought of ditziness. "We'll deal with them later. In fact, if they're there when we get to the Bronze, we can get dates and make them jealous."

"Read the cards, Buffy," replied a disbelieving Willow, before heading off to her cold shower.

"I'm not reading your love letters!" shouted a somewhat jealous Buffy as her friend bounded up the stairs. "It's not polite to read somebody else's stuff," stated the Slayer as she looked away from the package sitting across the table. "Besides, I'm not interested in Oz or Xander like that, so I don't need to know what they wrote to Willow." After a minute of this, Buffy began tapping her fingers nervously on the table. Then, finally unable to control herself, Buffy looked around anxiously to make sure that Dawn or Willow weren't watching, she all but leapt over the table in her effort to see what Willow had received.

"Ohhhh," sighed Buffy as she looked in the box, which contained a teddy bear holding a heart. The card beside this adorable little bear was one of the really nice cards, the ones with the pretty scenery and the romantic poetry on the front. Inside, it was signed:

I'll buy you a diamond ring, my friend  
If it makes you feel all right  
I'll get you anything my friend  
If it makes you feel all right  
'Cause I don't care too much for money  
For money can't buy me love

I'll give you all I got to give  
If you say you love me too  
I may not have a lot to give  
Not what I've got I'll give to you  
I don't care too much for money  
For money can't buy me love

Forever your love,  
Oz

"Always the sweetheart," whispered Buffy with a smile. She turned to the other card, which had a picture of Snoopy hugging Woodstock in a way that only best friends can. "Geez, Xander," announced the Slayer to herself thoughtfully, "when did you join the sweetheart club?" Buffy then opened the card, which, like the one from Oz, had something written inside:

Say you don't need no diamond rings  
And I'll be satisfied  
Tell me that you want the kind of things  
That money just can't buy  
I don't care too much for money  
Money can't buy me love

Say you don't need no diamond rings  
And I'll be satisfied  
Tell me that you want the kind of things  
That money just can't buy  
I don't care too much for money  
Money can't buy me love

Always yours,  
Xander

"God," replied Buffy as she sat down slowly, "They even used the same song."

"Yeah," croaked Willow as she sat down beside her best friend. "Lucky me, huh?"

"It'll be OK, Will," answered Buffy. "You just need to follow your heart."

"I wish it was that easy," countered Willow as she rose from her seat, leaving the room with a heavy heart.

"So do I, Willow," whispered Buffy as she stared at the table, wishing in vain for the world to be simple again, just this once, for Willow.


	6. Track 6: A Hard Day's Night

It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog. It's been a hard day's night-I should be sleeping like a log. But, when I get home to you, I find the thing that you do will make me feel all right.

You know I work all day to get money to buy you things, and it's worth it just to hear you say you're gonna give me everything. So, why I love to come home? 'Cause when I get you alone, you know I'll feel okay....

When I'm home, everything seems to be right. When I'm home, feeling you holding me tight. Tight, yeah.

It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog. It's been a hard day's night-I should be sleeping like a log. But, when I get home to you, I find the thing that you do will make me feel all right. So, why I love to come home? 'Cause when I get you alone, you know I'll feel okay....

When I'm home, everything seems to be right. When I'm home, feeling you holding me tight. Tight, yeah.

It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog. It's been a hard day's night-I should be sleeping like a log. But, when I get home to you, I find the thing that you do will make me feel all right. You know I feel alright. You know I feel alright.....

* * *

I look around the entryway to the Hyperion solemnly, knowing that I should thank Angel, Cordelia, and their friends for helping me while I've been living with them. However, if I'm ever going to be happy, truly happy, I need to go home, and stay there, until I've settled things with my beloved once and for all. I just hope that Xander will be able to forgive me if I end up stealing Willow away from him. And I wonder if I'll be able to live with myself, too, if I end up with my heart's desire.


	7. Track 7: I Feel Fine

Buffy walked into the Bronze and saw Oz practicing on the stage. If not for the changes to the club since her second death, it would look exactly like a scene she had seen countless times during high school. "Hey Oz," she announced as she closed in on the guitarist.

"Hey Buff," he replied, almost beaming as he spoke. (Or what passed for beaming with Oz, that is.)

"You sound happy today," said Buffy as she smiled at him. "Did ya win the lottery or something? Because if you did, I'm not below taking handouts, you know."

"No, nothing like that," answered Oz as he smirked at the Slayer's coy suggestion. "Just talked to Willow a while ago."

"That's good," she said, trying hard not to speak her mind in this instance. "Talking usually leads to good things.....right?"

"I'm in love with her, and I feel fine."

"That's good to hear," announced Buffy, though she wasn't sure what to make of Oz's declaration.

"Sorry," answered Oz as he played a few chords slowly on his guitar. "Old song stuck in my head."

"Just as long as I don't start singing for no reason whatsoever, that's fine by me," answered Buffy. "I *so* don't want to go there again."

"Willow told me about that. Somewhere between the story of Dawn going out with a vampire on Halloween and the one about you fighting a lady with giant penis growing out of her head at the Doublemeat Palace." He smirked at that last one. The wild stuff you see on the Hellmouth....

"Trust me, Oz, this hasn't been one of my finer years." Buffy smiled, then began laughing, and continued doing so for a couple of minutes until she said, "I don't even know if I've ever had a finer year in Sunnydale."

"Sophomore year of high school?"

"Died."

"Jun....never mind. Senior year?"

"Well, Snyder died and I blew up the school. Does that count as a good year?"

"I think so," replied Oz with a bit of humor in his voice. "You also got that cool umbrella...."

"Yeah," agreed the Slayer as she fondly remembered her lone reward in all her years of "service". "Did Willow tell you that she and Tara fixed it last year?"

"Not really," he admitted. "Tara didn't come up much."

"She loved her a lot," Buffy noted solemnly.

"Yeah," said Oz, not showing any of his feelings on the matter.

After a long, uncomfortable silence, Buffy said, "So, what did Willow say?"

* * *

"You remember the card I gave her?"

Anya looked at her ex-fiance with her best So? expression before saying, "Was this before or after you bought her the flowers?"

"Before," replied Xander. "Why do you ask?"

"I'm trying to sound like I actually care," answered the demon bluntly. "What does this card you gave her have to do with anything?"

* * *

"She's so glad, she's telling all the world that her baby buys her things, you know. 'He buys her diamond rings.' You know. She said so."

"You're buying her diamond rings?" asked Buffy, again failing to believe her ears.

"Well, no," answered Oz, "still got that song in my head. The lyrics sort of fit."

"Oh," replied Buffy, still a little unsure of Oz's somewhat mysterious meaning. "So she's been telling everyone about the presents you've given her?"

* * *

"Yeah," said Xander as he smiled slightly. "I talked to her today, and she was pretty happy about the flowers. Basically, she's in love with me, and I feel fine."

"She loves him, too," answered Anya, "so I wouldn't exactly call it a colossal victory or anything."

Xander scowled at the woman, or demon if you will, for a moment before responding. "Thanks, An, for that wonderful shot of pessimism."

"Excuse me," she interrupted, "but I still sort of love you, you know. It's not exactly easy listening to you try to win Willow's heart or whatever, you know."

"I'm sorry An, but I need this. I need my Wills."

"Of course," replied the broken-hearted vengeance demon.

* * *

"She's in love you, and you feel fine."

"That about sums it up, Buffy," remarked Oz with one of his trademark grins as he turned his attention back to his guitar.

"Then I'm happy, too," declared the Slayer with a smile as she felt an odd twinge in her heart.


	8. Track 8: Eight Days a Week

If there's anything that's been awkward for me since coming back to Sunnydale, it's rejoining the Scooby Gang. Okay, so there's also that love triangle I'm in with Willow and Xander, but that's just part of the fun of becoming a Scooby again.

It's not like everyone has it out for me. Buffy, despite her opinion on the love triangle thing, happily welcomed me back into the fold. Dawn was pretty happy, too, but she always worshiped the ground I walked on (although nowhere near as much as with Xander and Cordelia). And Willow.....

Willow's not a Scooby anymore. Buffy and Dawn won't say it, but the message is clear: Willow isn't a part of the Scoobies anymore, at least not in their minds. I haven't heard the specifics, but it seems that Willow managed to thoroughly burn some bridges between herself and Buffy and Dawn while she was on her Psycho Will kick. It's nothing specific, or even conscious, but I can tell it when it comes time for us to go on patrol. Their scent changes, and they freeze up ever so slightly without realizing it. Apparently, they can love her, but they can't trust her with their lives.

Xander's a different story altogether. He loves her, eight days a week. Apparently, Xander still has issues with the whole concept of reality thing.

I'm not bitter or anything. (Well, not much.) You'd think that Cordelia or this Anya girl he used to be with (who seriously has to be the strangest woman I've ever met in my life) never even existed, because it's all about Willow with him, and making things right for her.

And that's where the eight days a week concept comes in.

For some reason, Xander needs more than the standard seven days to be devoted to Willow. I'm not even sure that eight is enough, to be honest.

Buffy tells me that Xander used this whole "yellow crayon" speech to get Willow to not destroy the world. And it obviously worked, since hey, there's still a world and everything.

I can't be surprised at that, just because it's how things are between them. I've been getting Willow Time, and so has he, but I keep thinking that Xander's Willow Time is so much better than mine just because he tries to cram that extra day or so of loving into the seven he actually gets.

Right now, Willow's with Xander, covering their part of the cemetery on the nightly Scooby Gang Patrol Fun Session with his eyes that beg for her to hold him, to love him. It's not my choice, but Buffy and Dawn still have that trust thing that Xander doesn't.

Not that I mind patrolling with Buffy and Dawn or anything. Granted, my memories of her are all fake, what with the Key thing and all, but she's still a joy to be around. Plus, she's a lot like Willow, especially since she's actually getting to go on patrol now. Calling her a spaz would be a gross understatement of the word "spaz".

Just like Willow.

Then there's Buffy. We get a lot of comfortable (and uncomfortable) silences while Dawn is off bouncing around through the graves like a rubber ball, but I'm also getting to know her, really know her, for the first time. It's amazing just how self-depreciating Buffy is, despite balancing so many responsibilities on her shoulders all at once. She's even more of a duck than Willow, because she's paddling even harder below the surface, all while taking it in perfect stride, with nothing more than a stake and a witty remark.

She's explained to me why she wants Willow and Xander to be together, and why she wanted Xander to marry Anya, and even for me to be with Willow, way back when: they all represent the "normal" relationships she can't have as the Slayer. Buffy has to shut herself in, because she might die any day, just like that. She doesn't want to hurt anyone who can't deal with that, so that's why she spends her time with guys like Angel and Spike instead of guys like Riley. And since my guy version of PMS involves me turning into a snarling werewolf, I can sort of relate to that, and a part of me wishes I could be that normal guy for her.

But, I love Willow.

And so does Xander. Eight days a week.


End file.
